It's been a tough week and despite my mum being ill for so many years, one that none of us really saw coming.
I was woken by the phone ringing very early on Tuesday morning. The home phone never rings, we don't even have a handset upstairs but I knew right away the conversation that lay waiting for me on the other end of the line. I raced to the phone and despite knowing what he was going to say, my brother's words hit me like a ton of bricks. BOOM. After twenty plus years of suffering from emphysema my mum had just passed away.
Practicalities kicked in and my brother, No1 son and I headed to my dad in Cornwall. We had strength in each other's company but dad's phone rang constantly and seeing him break just a little bit further with each and every call chipped away at us.
I chose to see her at the hospital and it hit me then that she was really gone, that I didn't have a mum anymore. That was quite simply the worst moment of my life.
Please cherish yours because when she's gone you will need her more than you ever did.
I dedicate this post to my mum, who despite battling such an awful illness for so long, was a huge inspiration to so many others.
I love you mum.