Saturday, 4 July 2009

Sponge Bob Square Pants and my other Irrational Hates


1. In some fashion circles good old Sponge Bob Square Pants is a style icon. Designer Marc Jacobs even proudly supports a tattoo of the said yellow sponge. So why then does it drive me totally and utterly mad?
I HATE it, and with a vengeance. But why??

It could be because the kids will sit in front of it at any given chance and whilst they are watching it - they pay absolutely no notice to what I am saying. This usually happens on a morning when I disappear to have a shower and ask them to get ready for school.

When I get out of the shower they are either a) Still downstairs in front of the TV where I left them or on the odd occasion b) Sitting in DinoBoy's bedroom still in their PJ's like vegetables.

It makes me boil... and I can't even say that I have ever sat through even five minutes of an episode ( I have slept through enough and as I seem to know all of the characters names and places of interest I have obviously subconsciously absorbed more than I would like to admit).

2. The fact that my kids wait till I have sat down to ask me to do something. Example... I make a meal. Ask them if they would like anything, they say no. I sit down and then one of them asks if I can get them a drink...

Did I not just ask if they wanted anything?

3. They way my white dog always chooses to escape out of the garden and roll in sheep / fox / cow poo the day after I have bathed her.

4. Peanut Butter. I like peanuts so why does the thought / smell of peanut butter make me want to puke?

5. That despite me telling him every other week for the whole school year DinoBoy continues to hoard homework and school letters in his bag. Every evening I ask him if he has any homework and he always says no. Tell me why then that when I went through his bag yesterday there were school dinner bills going back to May and at least five pieces of homework. That boy lives in Sonny son land with his family of Cuski's!

6. The fascists at Paypal. I hate that they can just take funds out of your account on the say of a buyer who is completely trying it on. Even when case is closed in your favour they take a week to pay you back. Daylight robbery.

7. The fact that I can never find a pair of ballet socks. My clean basket has about 15 ballet socks in it, all differing size and colour. Taking into consideration that ModelGirl and FunnyGirl both wear the same size - how can that be?

8. That DinoBoy cannot close his wardrobe or drawers. I must have told him about it close to 100 times - yet everytime I walk into his bedroom they are open........ Urgh.....

9. This isn't irrational but I thought that I would throw it in anyway... I hate that I can't wear high heels. I dream about owning a pair of sky high hooker shoes (as FunnyGirl calls them). I know that it is stupid and if I could actually wear them in all honesty I probably wouldn't.
I was 21 when I broke my ankle and had it pinned and I had never had a cinderella moment before then. But now that I absolutely can't I want, want want.

10. Any stroller that isn't a Stokke Xplory...
Ok so not totally but I don't get why anyone would want anything else!

Tomorrow, 10 things that I love part 1!

I would like to add that @byyanto has just commented to me that I am a bit hard on Sponge Bob. He says it is very well written. WHAT? I think that this is possibly my point. I think that it is full of subliminal messages. How else would I be able to say to you. Sponge Bob, Crusty Crab, Patrick, Squidward, Plankton, Gary, Sandy Cheeks & Crabby Patties? I rest my case.

I would love some feedback from you guys with some of the things that you irrationally hate.

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